What are we really celebrating on Cinco de Mayo? Other than my daughter’s birthday, of course. May 5th is not when Mexico celebrates its independence day. That biggie is September 16th. I was in Puerto Vallerta on Cinco de Mayo once celebrating my retirement with a cruise. Nothing was shaking, usual tourist stuff. Surprise. Seems May 5th is an American creation.

The Bruce Maiman column in March 4, 2014 Sacramento Bee fleshed out the answer to my question. Basically, in 2010 five white students at Morgan Hill’s Live Oak High School came to school on Cinco de Mayo in shirt with the U.S. flag emblazoned on them. Fearing the same kind of violence that had erupted during the observation the year before, school officials said they needed to reverse the shirts or reverse their route and go back on suspension. In the aftermath, the parents of three of those students filed law suits claiming the school had violated their freedom of speech rights. A three-judge panel’s conclusion was that “the student safety outweighed student First Amendment rights.”

No real news there. In these halcyon days of litigation, everyone is sue-happy. What Maiman went on to report, though, sent me scurrying to Wikipedea. On a recent Justified federale told suspected drug mules that Americans only go to Mexico for margaritas and drugs. Partying gringos travel south to party on a day that celebrates the outnumbered Mexican Army routing a superior French Army that some people called the best in the world at that time. The Battle of Puebla was significant to Mexico but not enough to build an entire Spring Break-like scenario around it. Margaritas, again. How many American celebrants know about the significance of that May 5th battle? It happened in 1862 and the U.S. was not in a partying mood. Seems there was this little conflict going on, the name of which depends on who you talk to. Historians call it The Civil War. Regular Southerners call it The War of Northern Aggression, while the more refined ex-slave owners spoke of it as “That Recent Unpleasantness.” The French were in Mexico because Juarez’s government defaulted on loans made to them by European countries during their War of Independence. Spain and England blockaded Veracruz but finally went home to wait for the promise of repayment after two years. Napoleon III saw an opening and took it. He invaded and put MaximillianI as ruler of Mexico.

Now, with his army entrenched, the French Supreme Ruler figured that he could help the Confederacy and free up their ports being blockaded. This dream fell with quite a bit of the 8,000 soldiers at Puebla. The Civil War over, the U.S. began to help Mexico, under the counter, of course, and Max was toppled and executed and the French were sent home.

How would the U.S. look today if Puebla had gone to the French? We’d probably be pledging to the Stars and Bars flying over Richmond, Virginia at the very least. We might be speaking French as well, given the Napoleon boy’s penchant for giving world domination a try.

It seems odd that a fabricated celebration could push at the foundation of one of our most precious amendments. I know, the Second Amendment is what has everyone up in arms, literally, but Freedom of Speech? Come on. Well, we’ve been debating arming our teachers so why no there? I remember when wearing Old Glory was a hideous thing to do. A couple of people spitting on me after my release from the Navy in the 1960’s wore shirts and skirts made from the flag. Pro-war protestors screamed bloody murder. Sure, things changes. That was my second choice for the title of this column. I’m old fashioned; I still don’t like to see the flag used that way, but I don’t wear my ball cap inside either.

It would be great to survey the Cinco de Mayo partiers. Are those of Mexican heritage celebrating a big historical win? Are the U.S. partiers just using a convenient excuse to do their thing? How many on either side realize the importance of that battle at Puebla?

Jerry Tuck is a retired San Andreas resident and an indie author. Contact him at olwhofan@aol.com or use the Contact Form.